20 / 07 / 2024
5 Minute Read

Sex for people with a disability : Why is it important?

 

Not everyone is blessed with good health. We have all had our own health problems; a bad case of flu, a broken leg while skiing or an eye infection. In most cases, however, everything recovers after a relatively short time. But how about people who were born with a disability or who did not fully recover after an illness or an accident? Today, I would like to talk about sex for people with a disability because it has been too much of a taboo, as if disability and sex were incompatible.

 

Why people with a disability need a sexual life?

Despite strokes of fate, many people have a positive attitude towards life. This also includes not being ashamed to meet personal needs, including the desire for tenderness, eroticism and/or sex. From an emotional, psychological and social point of view, sexuality is just as important in the lives of people with a disability as it is in those of non-disabled people. Why should there be a difference? Whether we have a disability or not, we are all human beings, identically constituted, and our primary needs remain the same, whether our mobility is reduced or not.

 

The positive impact of sex for people with a disability

Sex is an essential component of human equilibrium. In fact, not only does having sex contribute to our mental, physical and emotional health, it also helps build self-confidence and helps individuals feel valued and appreciated for who they are, beyond their disability. Intimate relationships also help people with a disability to combat social isolation while empowering them at the same time. In fact, when people with a disability have sex on a regular basis, they get the chance to explore their sexuality and personal boundaries, nurturing a sense of control over their own lives, eventually contributing to a richer and more fulfilling life.

 

Why is sex for people with a disability such a taboo in society?

Generally speaking, society talks too little about disability. In recent years, great efforts have been made in favor of people with a disability, but there is still a long way to go in terms of rights and social inclusion. Having a physical or mental disability is still too stigmatized by society, and little training and education on the subject is done to raise awareness.

No wonder why, talking about the sexuality of people with a disability is an additional obstacle for those who are unfamiliar with the reality of disabled people.

Yet addressing the intimacy needs of people with a disability involves recognizing their rights to sexual expression and relationship fulfillment.

 

What are the options to experience sex for people with a disability?

It is often not easy for people with a disability to find someone who can fulfill their intimate/sexual needs and fantasies.

It can often be easier for people with disabilities to open up sexually to another person facing the same reality. That is why many of them turn first to specialized dating sites aimed exclusively at people with disabilities. Here, the main goal is not the search for sexual pleasure, but the search for a true love encounter.

The other alternative is to call on professionals, specialized and trained in intimacy with people with a disability. In the german part of Switzerland, the Sexcare.ch agency for example offers to spend time with men and women who go to the home of the disabled person who, for her part, has the assurance of spending a pleasant and harmonious time with a trustworthy person who will understand their condition and be able to listen to them, all this without being judgmental.

In many other cases, the option for paying for sex is chosen. Why? Because he/she wants to have more choices, to be in the company of a very particular type of beauty, he/she has a fantasy in mind that can only satisfy with an escort... the reasons to choose sex with an escort are multiple!

But even then, it is not as easy as it may sounds. Unfortunately, not many escort ladies offer sex for people with a disability. It is not always because they do not want to, but often, it is due to a lack of experience, fear of complications and generally a fear of not being able to handle (or not feeling comfortable) unusual situations.

However, many escort girls are actually very open to meeting someone with a disability. Sometimes, it is an experience they have never had because the opportunity has never arisen! And let's not forget that there are also many escorts who have training in social work or who are former nurses or caregivers and who therefore have a very developed knowledge and human sensitivity. Other sexworkers, with a lot of life experience and people skills, would embark on the adventure according to the motto "learning by doing".

Despite appearances, there are more escort girls than you might think who would be happy to spend an intimate moment in the company of a person with a disability. Because each of them has their own sensitivity and limits, it is important for the person with a disability to be open and honest about the type of disability he/she has and the type of service he/she is looking for. It is also important to bear in mind that not all Escorts Incall locations are wheelchair accessible, Outcalls are probably more suitable when it comes to sex for people with a disability.

 

Sex for people with a disability, explained in a video

I am proud to share with you a video that I discovered and that blew me away : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D-_lL5_d94E (original video in German, please activate the subtitles for an English translation).

The way in which this somewhat "taboo" subject is tackled is simply remarkable! The reporter distances himself from prejudices and value judgments and presents us with his pertinent questions, asked with respect, what is the job of the sexual assistant. What makes this report outstanding for me is its credibility and authenticity. It is indeed rare to dare speaking openly about this type of subject.

 

Let’s say yes to Sex and disability!

If you are a person with a disability (whether the disability is visual, auditory, physical, mental, motor, visible or invisible...)  or a friend/relative of a person with a disability, remember that he/she has also sexual needs, such as other people.

To consider that they can be excluded from sex and intimacy is dehumanizing for people with a disability. No matter how they get access sexual pleasure and satisfaction, sex for people with a disability should not be a taboo, quite the contrary!

 

Janet - The Velvet Rooms

 

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