29 / 08 / 2024
2 Minute Read

Sapiosexual: What exactly is it?

 

The word sapiosexual pops up again and again, often on dating and partner search sites. In most cases, it's women who describe themselves this way (and not just the ugly ones...). A new buzzword or what's behind it? Let's take a closer look at this term.

 

What is a sapiosexual?

According to Wikipedia, the word sapiosexual is used to talk about a person who is more attracted to intelligence than appearance.

To be sapiosexual means to perceive intelligence (including academic intelligence, emotional intelligence, creativity, wisdom...) as the most attractive quality in a partner and should not be confused with a sexual orientation such as heterosexual, homosexual or bisexual. In short, it is exclusively about a preference or a characteristic that influences attraction.

 

Sapiosexual: not recognizable to the eye

Unfortunately, you can't tell how intelligent a person is by simply looking at them. He/she can be super well-dressed and styled, and his/her IQ is the same as his/her age... In contrast, a nerd, who looks rather repulsive from the outside, can be super intelligent. This simple remark already shows that visual recognition of the sapiosexual is not possible.

In most cases, however, the first contact will be visual. Be it in real life or on the web. The person opposite or in the picture should be likeable, attractive and not repulsive. Nobody wants to get involved with someone who seems unpleasant or even dangerous. And when it comes to visiting an escort for the first time, it is more than obvious that her physical appearance will make it or break it: no sapiosexual futility here! In fact, in this particular context, I think that shouldn't be one of your main criteria for having a good time with an escort girl.

 

How does the sapiosexual find a match?

How does the sapiosexual find a partner? This is where dating sites come into play. Here you have the option of presenting yourself without a picture, posting a photo of your parrot instead of a selfie, or the really cheeky ones post a fake photo online. The latter is a bit risky, especially when it comes to meeting in person. When chatting back and forth, it quickly becomes clear who is intelligent and who is not...

I'm sure everyone has experienced it. The first impression of the other person is not so great. Then there are the oversized freckles and the strange clothes... and still you get to know each other better. Often forced to do so at work, in a club or during higher education. If you then discover and learn to appreciate the person and their good qualities, then suddenly the freckles belong to this person who now seems likeable and beautiful. The same goes for the funny style of clothing; it emphasizes personality and self-confidence. So, in my opinion, we're all a bit sapiosexual because who wants to be together with a complete idiot?

 

What should be considered when using the term sapiosexual?

What do we learn from it? The sapiosexual buzzword has something good about it. It reminds you that you shouldn't just judge a person by their appearance, but that you should give yourself the chance to get to know their inner values. Whether you fall in love with his/her humor, or his/her intelligence is rather irrelevant. The main thing is that Cupid's arrow hits the right heart!

Your next date is sure to be exciting ... ;-)

 

A.M - The Velvet Rooms

---